GOALS; or, things that make my brain hurt.....

Whenever I felt bad today about having to control my impulses (and bear with me while I write this), I kept thinking about what happened to that poor young man on the bus outside Winnipeg. It was horrific and awful and I hate to be dramatic, but I honestly feel like everyone here isn't just shocked but scarred and scared by it. I was on the subway this morning on my way to work and everyone was reading about it in the papers and just shaking their heads, visibly upset by what they were reading.

I've had so many more opportunities in my life and been able to do so much more with my life than he will ever get to have. It's not fair that I got that and he didn't just because of some clearly evil person and a random choice of where to sit on a bus. In some ways, it puts what I'm whining about into perspective and makes me feel crummy about squandering my life away irresponsibly. Yet it makes me even more grateful that I have the chance to change and become a better person. If I don't squander, I can appreciate what I do buy for myself a lot more.

I just keep telling myself 'short term frowns equal long term smiles'. Yes, I know I sound like a twit, but it's short and sticks in my brain like my high school locker combination, so hopefully I can remember it when my impulse control issue rears its head.

So, goals. Defining them isn't exactly fun - I need to be more exacting with myself in order to achieve them and self-awareness isn't really my forte. That whole "gaze upon a mirror crack'ed" always makes me feel uncomfortable in my own skin so I try to avoid doing that wherever possible.

Trust me, I have avoidance and elusiveness down to an art form.

So, goals.

1. Stop stealing from my savings account, to pay my chequing account. It goes in there for a damn reason and it needs to stay there. Goal amount - $4,000.
2. Do more with RRSPs. I've decided that I want to get to $100,000 in RRSPs and conservative investments by the time by the time I'm 35. I'm not doing terrible here, though I could do a lot better. When I first started my job over a year and half ago, I immediately signed up for the pension plan. My company has a policy that they will match your contributions throughout the year. I went for the maximum allowable amount. I also made sure to pick what I was told by an advisor would be the most profitable yet not as risky investment allocations. So far, I've made $3,939.38! I'm really, really, really proud of myself!
3. Build an emergency fund. I want to have 6 months of substantive living expenses saved up. I'm focusing on $8,600. I'm more concerned about building it than by a deadline for having it.
4. Build a travel fund. I want to be able to go off to London or New York or Rome on holiday without feeling horrible or wondering 'can I afford this and what will I have to give up to do so'. Goal amount, $3,000.
5. Condo Downpayment. Luckily, I was smart enough to NOT take a chunk of money from my dad when my mum died. I took the non-house-related cash she left me (paid for a year of school and living expenses). I did NOT take the rest, so I have part of a downpayment kept handily away from me by my dad. So, I want to prove to myself I am responsible to take on the positive debt of a lifetime - a home of my own. I can do that by saving up a good downpayment for me. The goal amount is $25,000.

I am determined to succeed.

So, to summarize:

• Savings goal = $4,000. Current status - $11.00.
• Retirement Goal = $100,000. Current status - $3,939.38
• Emergency Fund = $8,600. Current status - $0.
• Travel Fund = $3,000. Current status - $0.
• Condo Downpayment = $25,000. Current status - $0.